Once a fellow was attending an auction, when he encountered a rather sour looking parrot. After several minutes of trying to get the bird's attention, it finally stared at him with that "I don't like you and I bite" look that large parrots employ so expertly.
Not to be defeated, the man resolved, with true American fervor, that he could win that bird over if just given enough time.
The bidding commenced and after a bit of back and forth, our hero's competitive drive takes over. He really wants the bird, so he is caught up in the bidding. On and on he goes, as the bids are higher and higher. But, he is continually outbid.
Finally, after having bid way more than he intended, he has won - the parrot is his at last!
As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the Auctioneer,
"I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk."
"Don't worry," said the Auctioneer. "He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"